Quick Before I Forget: Eyes Open, Arms Up

0:01 I can remember the way the carpet felt because it was the kind of carpet that was in a spot that didn't get traversed or sat on that often because it was super, super close to the TV. Like we're talking inches, about as close as you could be to one of those TVs that used to be hooked up to a VCR playing a VHS tape of The Little Mermaid. What else would it have been playing but The Little Mermaid? It was playing The Little Mermaid featuring my favorite Disney princess, Ariel. And I could not see it. I was inches away.

0:43 I was as close as you could be. And I could not see it. I couldn't see Ariel. I couldn't see Sebastian, the whole crew. They were blurry because I was wearing a patch on my right eye. which is my strong eye, my healthy eye, the eye that has gotten me through. I was wearing a patch on my right eye, so I couldn't see the TV because my left eye was at that point 2,400, which is considered legally blind. So yes, I was at the age of four, legally blind in my left eye. The doctors scared the crap out of my parents. They basically told them that I probably wouldn't live what would be considered a normal adult life. I probably maybe wouldn't drive. And they were heartbroken.

1:48 And they were scared. But they showed up anyway. My mom showed up anyway in the fear. She patched me So patch over my right eye so that the muscles and everything involved with using your left eye would work harder and build up the elasticity to improve and heal from nothing that we understood at the time. It was nobody's fault. It's not like something went wrong. It's just I could not see out of my left eye. I have a stigmatism and a lazy eye in my left eye. And when I'm really tired or really sick, You can always tell. And I'm super self-conscious about it in photos.

2:31 But the whole point is my mom showed up for me in the fear by patching my good eye in a way that made me not be able to see. So at the age of four, I couldn't see, but I could hear. And the music, guys, the music got me through. So one of the coolest things that I remember about my love Ariel is I actually won a dance contest the only time I've ever won a dance contest by the way I won a dance contest and the prize was a copy a VHS copy you remember the one with like the puffy plastic packaging the VHS of the Little Mermaid which was my favorite favorite movie so I That was the prize. And in order to prep for it, my mom actually took me to Anita's dance studio. Um, I think in like new Berlin or something, the South side of Milwaukee, Wisconsin, she takes me to this dance studio and I was going there anyway for dance classes, but I think this was extra. I think, I think this was like an extra, um, like paid lesson or whatever, which we didn't, we didn't do stuff like that. So it was special. It was special. And I got my dance routine all set. For Under the Sea from the Little Mermaid soundtrack. And I dressed up like Ariel. And I performed Under the Sea at Bucky's

4:02 Super Video. And I won. And I danced like no one was watching. And here's the thing. I am a terrible dancer. I try my best. But I'm awful at it. But four-year-old me didn't care. Four-year-old me was living her best life. And she was winning the Little Mermaid video that she would later not be able to see. But she could hear it. And before my mom even knew that she was doing it, she showed me, she modeled for me how to show up in fear. So I'm back for round two, showing up in fear to talk to you again, because round one was so fun. And thank you so much because so many of you reached out and said, I don't want to cry. So many of you reached out and said what the episode meant to you and how you interpreted it and how you were a little upset with me.

5:29 Cause I didn't answer all the questions. And here's the thing. I really wanted to, like I had good intentions and I was going to answer all 22 questions. And then I realized that that would not do justice to the questions. Cause I don't know. I did pin the post. There's a post pinned on Instagram with my photo. And then like the quick, before I forget, like, let's ask all the, ask me anything. Okay. And that's still there and it's still open until further notice. I'm leaving the conversation open. They're open. Please go get it. Please go give me your questions because this is not something that's just going to be this one time thing. No, no, no. We are here for a minute. We are here for the whole yellow brick road, y'all. So send me your questions.

6:09 Keep the conversation going. Stop right now and say one thing you're grateful for in the comments, please. And thank you. Just one small thing doesn't have to be fancy. I'm grateful for my little candle here. I don't know if you can see it. It says manifestation. And it's the cutest. I'm going to have to show that. I'm going to have to show that at some point. But thank you for reaching back. Thank you for taking the time out of your life to reach back and say hello to me in the comments and to listen and leave reviews on the apps. And the thing was, there was one thing that everybody was a little bit like, Ty. Okay, so Ty. We're going to answer all the questions. That's the point. We are going to answer all the questions.

6:55 They are going to get answered. I don't make promises that I don't deliver on. So we are going to answer all the questions. It's just not going to happen right this minute. It's not going to happen today. It's going to happen in pieces because you guys have given me the roadmap for season two with these questions, and I hope they keep coming. So for today, we are answering three. And what was really cool as I was thinking and working through these questions, what was really cool was these three actually come together in a way that tells a whole story. And it's all about vision and how our eyes are open and our arms are up. So buckle up, friends. It's time to dive in. My first question today comes from my very new friend, Stacy, who I actually got to spend some time with kind of swapping life stories this week a little bit more.

7:44 We met each other at my friend C.W. Hawley's Goals Night Out event, and she's just a very nice, incredibly abundant human and new friend. And Stacey's question was a hard one, is a hard one, but we're going to unpack it together. So the question is, let me find it. Stacey's question is, who are you when you strip away the roles, responsibilities, positions, and problems to solve? I needed a minute with that question because of course I'm a mama and a wife and I love those jobs more than anything. And I'm a fixer. I'm a connector. I'm a problem solver. I'm a writer. I'm a best-selling author.

8:35 I am a friend. I am so many things. I'm the emo rollercoaster gal. I am... A lot of different things to a lot of different people. And that has been the way that I've lived my life. And it all took me back to four-year-old me. It took me back to the girl who danced like no one was watching. The girl who found joy in music. The music got her through. Like... strip everything away from, from all the, like all the stuff. And what you have was like little me leaving these like breadcrumbs of things that would mean more to me with time, not less. Music, movement, joy, curiosity, story, connection, big feelings, big, big feelings. Wonder. Guys, I saw this Instagram post and I need to try to find it, but I saw this Instagram post of this woman talking this week about how the people in your life who are the most whimsical, they find magic everywhere they go and they look for all the little things. They have mastered the art of noticing and they err a little

10:05 bit on the side. Of cuckoo delusional, okay? I identify with this. The video though, the whole point of the video was that most people who are that whimsical and who do kind of live life a little bit on the air of like, sometimes you worry. They're that way because they choose to be, because it's a coping mechanism, because it's how they got through the darkness. That is why they are the way they are. They choose to see life as these little miracles happening throughout their day. They choose to to be the light because they were in the dark. They choose it. That is the whole point. They choose it just as you, just as you did when you were little. Like it, little me chose to do those things because she wasn't told to shrink yet. She wasn't told that she needed to use highest value and fewest words. And she wasn't being edited.

11:20 She wasn't being molded into something else. She was just being her. And it was enough. So who am I without all the job titles? Who am I without the different roles and responsibilities? I'm me. I'm four year old me. I am just a girl. I am just a girl. This is a story that I've told already on the show, but I'm going to share it again in a solo, which is, it just takes me through the through line of this embracing four-year-old me. Because I want you to embrace four-year-old you. So I'm going to paint the picture for you. Picture me walking out of Magic Kingdom after having the most magical morning. We rode Tron. I splurged on the photo pass and that is its own whole fun experience at Disney that I wish I'd done the first time. It was so good.

12:26 So good. And I was feeling so happy that like, it was just like coming out and I was crying just like now I was just giggly and happy. And my 10 year old son grabbed my hand. And he looked at me and. He said, mom, I just love that you're so childish. And it hurt. It actually hurt. I thought to myself, wow, that's probably not great. And then I let myself feel it. Because that's actually the nicest thing he's ever said to me. I know people that may have seen, you know, you're a childish mom.

13:19 I love that you're so childish. I know that people may have seen or may see that as a not so nice thing to say to a parent. And I think it was probably the nicest gift he's ever given me. Because it was like he gave four-year-old me a hug. And it ignited something special for me. I forgot what question I'm on. So I think where we're at is that Kelly, my dear friend who has helped me stay grounded and is my prayer warrior asked me, aside from my kids, what am I most proud of? And I think the best and honestly, most concise way to answer that would be that I am, I have become somebody that I trust. It's happened on my kind of journey of self-love, which is something that I know all of us may or may not struggle with. I mean, I certainly did. I struggled with like, what the heck is self-love even? Selfish is what I heard, but it's not at all. And I am on this journey of coming to love myself more. I trust myself. I am proud because I became somebody that four-year-old me would trust. The third question comes from a friend who's known me, I think, longer than the first two have. Our connection is rooted

14:50 in the RISE conferences with Rachel Hollis, where her and I waited in line together, I think. But we definitely met at RISE Minneapolis in 2019. So she's seen more of the experience that is my life than most have. And her question is essentially what motivates me? What, what gives me fire? And thinking about that was intense and involved a lot of prayer and in like just inner soul work, quite honestly, because what gives me fire dates back to another hard day. I would go as far as to say that June 30th of 2024 is about as close to a birthday as the emo rollercoaster gal could get. My birthday is two weeks later on July 13th, but June 30th of 2024 is the day that God set the fire in my heart. He started the fire in my heart. That is the same day that I submitted my chapter for the what became the best-selling book, Triumphs of Transformation, Inspiring Stories of Resilience and Life Change.

16:14 That is the book that I have a chapter in, the best-selling book that I have a chapter in called Becoming the Storm. The same day that I submitted that chapter, my oldest, dearest friend from college, who I met in high school, died in a fire with her daughter, her five-year-old daughter, her dad, her sister, and two of her other sister's kids. The same day that I submitted a chapter in what would become a best-selling book that I got to go celebrate in New York City and see displayed in Times Square, that same day, my friend died.

17:02 And that is... the emo rollercoaster gal, because grief and joy can coexist and often do. But getting to know that and getting to experience it in a way that I practice on rollercoasters ever since and intensely and connectedly and collectively, healingly, Like, I don't even know where I'm going with this, guys. This journey has been intense. That was not the most intense thing to happen. It was one of the most intense things to happen, but there's been so much else that's happened. All with the fire that God started in my heart to be the light.

18:00 I believe it. I am meant to be the light. because I became the light for myself when I became the storm, I am meant to be the light for me to ignite others, to heal, to heal, to see their own light because it's there. It's absolutely there already. That's the thing that I wish I could shake younger me, versions of me, 22 year old me. I want to just, Just want to shake her because. She thought she was fat. She thought she was fat and she drank too much. And I just, I just, I just wish she knew that the light was there all along. The power was there all along. I wish, I wish I, that's what I wanted. One of the many things that I wish I could tell 22 year old me, by the way. To answer my own question, which I ask so many of our guests on the episodes of season one of Quick Before You Forget. Go check those out if you haven't. And say hi. You know, while we're here, say hello and say something in the chat.

19:15 Tell me how we're feeling. Tell me if there's been something that you thought, like, Ty took me to church with this one-liner. I would love to hear that. Please talk back to me. So the question is, was short and the answer is long, but the fire is God's work and God's timing and God's purpose on my heart. I actually had somebody who I kind of, you know, a lot of this is surprisingly not surprisingly at all. relating back to connections with people. And one of the connections, so we went through three questions and I'm going to tell this story and then I'll try to wrap myself up here. But I had a I had a bumpy and hard week this week. So much more about this last couple of weeks has gone wrong than that has gone right. And I was feeling lost. And God sent reminders of the exact messages that I needed and from the people that I should have known that they were coming from. But There was one situation, one conversation in particular, where somebody actually encouraged me feedback-wise on the show to tone down the God talk. Tone it down. You might be polarizing people. I don't think that people... I don't know if you should talk so much about Jesus. Nope.

20:49 We're not doing that. That's not happening here. I am living... into the, I can't preach, I can't say, let's be excited instead of fearful and not recognize the author of the story. It's not happening. So the author of this story is God and the fire that lights inside is his work. To answer Christine's question in the longest winded way possible, God keeps me going. Because my friend actually said that her favorite thing that I said in the last episode, I'm going to say it again because I'm actually really proud of it, is I don't have a five-year plan. I don't have a 10-year plan. I have the Lord's plan and it is on my heart. And that is the fire. That is the motivation. Through him, with him, for him. Amen. Because that's where things come full circle. It took me also... to a place where I was thinking and reflecting on something that Trent Shelton said to me in a podcast interview when I was behind the scenes for, he said, God gave you the vision.

22:04 He did not give them the vision. Stop expecting them to see what you see. And is that not a full circle moment on this whole thing where we go back to four-year-old me who could not see, Like she couldn't see. And then 37 year old me gets on a roller coaster and chooses not to see. And now you have 41 year old me with eyes wide open, eyes wide open, arms up, heart open. And it's never been my vision. It's been his vision. So I can't see anything.

22:49 My eyes are open. But I can't see anything. It's blurry. I can see maybe that one brick. That one step. That one little part in front of me. But otherwise it's all him. It's the twists and the turns and the ups and the downs and the drops. It's all of it. And it's getting to share it with you. It's getting to share the light that burns. It's getting to share the stories and the miracles. It's getting to share it. Not so ironically, because nothing is coincidence and everything is miracles through the magic of glasses. I'll show you.

23:43 I'm going to show you the glasses. So these are the glasses. Hold on. If you're listening instead of watching, this is my weekly reminder to go watch these episodes because they're more fun that way. Um, so I'm putting on my fancy meta glasses, which I can't even really put. I'm just going to show them to you. Okay. We're going to do this. This is what I look like. On the roller coaster. Okay. These glasses, which one is, I think they're trying to start recording. Um, they're meta Oakley glasses and this is what I record safely on, on the rides. So that I can actually see you again. Let's put my real glasses back on. All right. So those glasses are the gateway to being able to share this with you. And I am so grateful because I got to wear glasses when I was four for a good reason. And now actually fun extra story bonus is that I, you know, now that I don't drink alcohol and my liver is almost basically healed and normal and healthy, I'm Most of my other body parts are aligning as well, including my sight, which is in better shape now at 41 than it has ever been as an adult, which is crazy. So my 2400i that we started with is now seeing almost healthy normal. She's still a little lazy. She still wanders off sometimes, but she sees well. And she sees just

25:13 that little bit in. Front of us. She doesn't see the whole path. She doesn't see the twists and the turns and the winds and the drops and all of the things. She can just see the little bit in front and share it because that's the reminder for all of us. Quick before we forget, we don't need to see the whole road or the whole track. We just need to show up anyway together. I will see you next time on the road. And I lied. Oh my gosh, I have to lie twice. Oh, that was good. That was a good ending, but I'm not, I can't end there. I had, I had made myself a promise that I would, oh my gosh, that I would choose the question for next time. Now it's in my cup. It's in, oh, well, maybe that one just, that one just picked the question for me. So thank you, self.

26:07 So I, it's, it's in my Taylor Swift cup and I just, For those on the listening, I just picked the question for next week, and it is Coach Doc. Okay, I'll tell you the question, and you're going to have to come back to hear the answer. So Coach Doc wants to know, if past Ty, present Ty, and future Ty were all sitting in a room together, what would they say? So come back for that next week, friends. And until then, I will see you next time on Quick Before I Forget. Much love always. I can't believe how much I came off the rails there at the end. Sorry, if you're still here, I love you. Thank you. And I want to say a special thank you to my sponsor, not sponsor right now, Zeke's Village Market. I am wearing one of my favorite shirts from them. It's purple and pretty.

27:09 It's like a lilac-y lavender color featuring Sister Bay, which is a cute town in Door County, Wisconsin. I'm going to try and probably fail to show you the pack because it's relevant. And you can see... I hope. I hope you can see Zeke, the dog who is named, who is the namesake of the store. He's on the back of the shirt and then it makes it one of my favorites. So the designs at Zeke's are really cool. And Zeke's is paired and partnered up with Guilty Apparel on a mission to create and sell souvenirs with soul. Okay, now, but I'm going to be so for real and say goodbye for real. I love you.

27:56 Bye.