June 18, 2025

How to Find Peace and Gratitude in a Drama-Filled World. [Ep: 798]

How to Find Peace and Gratitude in a Drama-Filled World. [Ep: 798]
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On today’s episode of The Ashley Berges Show, I invite you to shift your focus from society’s distractions to real sources of peace, joy, and freedom. Are you overwhelmed by the news, social media, and life's personal pressures? Join me as I explore how our so-called small things may hold the deepest value, and how to reconnect with them. We’ll also take a closer look at the people and situations that bring unnecessary drama into your life. Once you start experiencing drama-free days and nights, you’ll realize just how good life can truly feel. Listen now for simple tools to practice gratitude, gain clarity, and create a more grounded, joyful, and drama-free life. It’s time to stop chasing what doesn’t matter and start embracing what truly does.




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You're in a good place now.

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You are listening to Perspectives with Ashley Burgess.

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Hi, I'm Ashley Burgess and you're listening to my podcast

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formerly known as the Ligature Life Perspectives Podcast. Today, I

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want to ponder and think about what we consider our

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small things, what really matters in our life, and giving

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you some tools and some techniques for having gratitude but

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also seeing a deeper value, having more freedom, experiencing more happiness,

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more joy less drama every single day of your life.

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I mean, I know that you're bombarded by things. I

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know that you're being bombarded by the TV, by the news,

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by the media, by social media, by friends, by family,

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by drama. Everything under the sun is trying to take

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you off your connection with the things that actually can

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make you at peace, can make you feel free, can

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make you feel free, but also have freedom in your life.

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And so I want to talk about the things that

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we can be grateful for. And for many people you

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might say, hey, this is what I deem is a

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very small thing. But I've found that the world is

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kind of well topsy turby. What's up is down, what's

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down is up, what's small is big, what's big.

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As small, and it's very interesting.

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And so we're gonna discuss that today, and I'm gonna

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help you to see some things in your life that

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are gonna add some joy, some peace of mind, and

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some gratitude, because that's what we need to be able

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to get through this stuff, to get through this life,

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and to see this silver lining because it can be overwhelming.

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Let's talk about some of the small things that are

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actually really big things in our day to day life,

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because you know how they say they always kind of,

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you know, minimize the important things and maximize the things

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that aren't important. You know, it's all about it's this

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material society. You're supposed to have this and that at

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a big house, at a great car, multiple cars and

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planes and trains and everything else, supposed to all this stuff,

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jewelry's diamonds, multiple closets with so many clothes in it.

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I mean, you know that's what it's all about, right,

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It's all about getting things, buying things, having things, hoarding things.

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But that's not what's important.

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And so let's talk today about what really is and

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how do we begin to get more perspective on our life.

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How do we begin to find happier, joyful more. I

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don't know, just things that actually resonate at our highest frequency.

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How do we do that? And so, you know, the

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small things are actually everything, because the small things are

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not really small, right, They're actually quite large and they

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mean quite a bit. And the other day I kind

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of realize, you know, after you know, you go through

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a lot of these things in life, and you realize

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that most of the stuff that's talked about is bs.

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You realize that most of the news is BS. Most

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of the stuff on social media's BS. You know, what

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they tell us is true is probably not very true.

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And we go along and we kind of you know,

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you have one you know, awakening and another disillusionment, you know,

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and you get this, you know, you're like, wow, okay,

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here I am disillusioned again based on some false reality.

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So one of the things that I want you to

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think about.

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I was walking down the street the other day and

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I was coming back from the grocery store, and you know,

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I was just looking.

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It was like it was amazing. It was like this great,

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great weather day.

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And I'm one of those kind of people. I never

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really paid attention to the weather. I wasn't like, oh,

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I got what a great day or whatever. But it's like,

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when there are great days, do something about it. When

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there is a great day and you walk outside and

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the weather is so nice and the air is so clean,

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and the sun is shining like it should be shining,

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like a real sun should be shining, it's time to

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really enjoy that, relish in it, see it for what

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it is, see it in that moment for what it

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really is, and enjoy it and be in the moment.

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And that's what's so important, is being in the moment

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and seeing it for what it is, seeing it and

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participating is so important. It's really amazing when you actually participate.

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Like right now, as I'm recording this podcast, I'm looking

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out my window and I have this squirrel that has

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has lived on the property for a very long time,

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and she's staring at me. She's sitting on the fence

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line looking right into right into my office and it's

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adorable and she's just.

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Looking right at me.

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And it's a very amazing experience to take the moment

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to recognize and realize that this is really happening, and

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it takes time to really start focusing on the things

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that actually matter you have to change your focus, basically

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reframe the focus of what you're focusing on. And you know,

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like I stopped it's about the flowers the other day,

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and you know, the roses were blooming across the street,

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and I stopped at multiple rose bushes and I and

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I smelled them and they were so amazing. And I

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remember I still that for about five minutes, and I

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was grateful for that five minutes. I was like, Wow,

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that's that's a really amazing experience I just had. And

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as I'm walking back down the street, it's like, you know,

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I realize what it's like to you know, walking down

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the street. I also began to recognize something very interesting,

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and I asked you to begin to do some of

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these exercises and I was like, you know what I'm

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I mean, I feel good, I'm not in pain, I'm

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not struggling, I can walk, i can get somewhere.

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You know, I'm healthy.

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And being able to resonate in that frequency of health

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and be gracious and have gratitude for it in the moment,

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it's very practical and a very It changes your sense

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of self and the fact that you're not just racing

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through life.

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You're actually giving attention two things in your.

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Life, and you're you're grateful for those things. You're not

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just writing it off like, oh, well, that's just the

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way it's supposed to be, because a lot of times

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we don't participate in life. We don't participate, and it's

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not until later on down the road when people are going, God,

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I wish I would have smell those roses again, you know,

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Or I wish I would have been aware of my health,

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you know, back then when I was. I wish I

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would have just been, you know, aware and thankful. And

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I think the gratitude goes a long way for the

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longevity of things as well, Like the more grateful we

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are of things and honestly grateful, the more we get

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of those things, right, or the more.

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That it's consistently with you.

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And I think it's important to understand that because I

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think many of us get wrapped up in these challenging relationships,

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these toxic dynamics we're so drawn into trying to figure out,

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you know, cluster b dynamic. Oh my god, Am I

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dealing on borderline? Am I dealing with narcissism? I deal

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with histrionic? Am I dealing with a combination of everything.

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What am I dealing with?

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Oh my god, I'm trying to figure this person out,

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and I'm losing my identity and I'm getting more and

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more code of pinnate and oh my god. But what

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if even if you're going through this, even if you're

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going through a really challenging relationship right now, you're going

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through a breakup or a divorce, this is even more

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of a need and a want to do these types

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of things so you can begin to see a different

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side of your life. You can begin to see value

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in your life even when something is not It's not

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about money, it's not about paper, It's about right now

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and being focused on what's happening. I think it's amazing

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when you have gratitude for the moments of clarity, when

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you have full clarity and you're feeling really good about

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that clarity. It is amazing to have gratitude in that

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moment of clarity. I found that I have more and

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more clarity that way, the more gratitude I have around

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the clarity, the more days of clarity I get. And

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there's some days, and you and I both though, there's

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some days where you know it's just been so stressful

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or so much going on. You know where that stress

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or anxiety is getting to you, or a series of

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events you know, some of you maybe you know you

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realize that when you go out too much, or you

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party too much, you drink too much, you wake up

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the next day, oh, feeling horrible, absolutely horrible, and maybe

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you have brain fog all day or what have you.

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You know, and you can't seem to you know, focus.

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It's like when you have those moments of real, true clarity,

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It's it's a God's gift, right, It's like, wow, Okay,

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I'm clear, and I can see things in a much

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much more complete way, much more full way of seeing things.

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I also believe that you need to cherish and you

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want to be in order to cherish these things, you

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got to be able to see that it's happening.

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And reckon the value the.

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Moments where you actually feel really good, those moments in

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time where you actually feel really good. You feel good,

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you feel lighter, you feel healthy, you feel strong, you know,

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you feel balanced, and that to me is very valuable.

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And if you can kind of hone into that, that

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is a very valuable time to hone into and be

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thankful for those times and those moments of feeling good.

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You know, it's interesting too. It's like just being able

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to be cognitive of having a day, a moment, it

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could be even an hour where it's drama free. You

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have no drama, there's no drama on the plate. You're

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feeling good. Life is good, things are good, and it's

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just like drama free and that is a spectacular place

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to be at.

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Do you begin to resonate with that?

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And I think the more you are aware of that

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drama free moments, the more that you are thankful for

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those drama free moments, the moments where you recognize the

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fact they're in a drama free moment, The more drama

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free moments you get. I think many of us are

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on this pathway of you know, in relationships and in

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you know, lifestyles that are very drama filled. And I

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think that's because it brings us some entertainment. It makes

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things interesting, I guess. But but I'm asking you a question,

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does it really bring that to you or is it

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more of bringing you down? Is it more of creating

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problems in your life where you don't see the value

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within your life, You don't see the value in the

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small things because you're so overwhelmed all the time by

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the drama, inundated in the drama, that it's really hard

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to be able to, you know, get out of that

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drama circle, get out of this type of patterns that

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we brought to ourselves, and have that time where there

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is no drama. Nobody's creating drama, you're not creating drama.

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Nobody's bringing drama to you. And I think maybe focusing

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and seeing for a moment, who brings a lot of

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drama to your life? Who are the people in your

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life that bring a lot of drama to you? What

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type of drama is it, and how do you feel

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about the drama? How do you feel about the drama

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and really think about it, because we have to be

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aware of what's happening in our lives, the people that

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we're surrounding ourselves with and what they're bringing into our lives.

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And it's not like you can just get rid of

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everybody in your life, but there is an ability.

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To limit the amount of time that you're spending.

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With certain people that are bringing stress or unhappiness into

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your life. And you know, those drama free days are

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so credible, Those drama free nights are so incredible, and

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many of you aren't grateful for it. There are many

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people out there that are living in challenging relationships where

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every single night is drama and chaos and arguments and fights.

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And you know, some of you may say, Oh, my

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relationship's boring or what have you. But I mean, I think,

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you know, trying to see the value of not fighting,

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trying to see the value of someone that's not trying

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to bring up drama or to make you feel bad

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or to you know, shame you, or to push your buttons,

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and you know, I think those are interesting things to

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be grateful for. I think one big one, too, is

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when someone actually follows through with what they say they're

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going to do. I mean, nowadays, in the world that

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we live in, it's hard to have somebody follow through

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with what they say they're going to do. They might

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say they're going to do something they don't, And I've

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realized that if somebody does follow through though, it's so

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powerful and it's so awesome and to be grateful for that,

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because the more that we're grateful for that, and the

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more we hang out and spend time with and interact

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with and work with people that do follow through, the

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better our lives become. And the more grateful we are

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for the people that do follow through, the more follow

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through we actually get.

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Again.

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It's an interesting situation. It's it's very like circular. It's

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like the more you you are aware of it, the

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more you get it, the more you see it and

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you're grateful for it, the more it comes to you,

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the more that you're aware of the power of this,

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the better your life is, you know. I think also too,

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we sometimes take for granted our pets, you know, our

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dogs and cats, like the interesting times and experiences that

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we have with them, the moments we have that we

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can cherish with them, the times that we spend with them,

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the times that you know, maybe we're holding them or

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you know, petting them or having a nice walk or

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laying in bed with them and having that you know, experience.

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And you know, the other day I was I was

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laying in bed, I got I got buddy. He likes

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to sleep in his own bed at night, and which

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is great, and I think that's really helpful. And so

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early in the morning, I get them and I bring

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him into the bed and I just you know, I

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put him under the covers, put his little head on

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the pillow, and I just kind of watch them while

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he sleeps a little bit. And it's something that's really

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important to me because I don't know, you know, I'm

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grateful for the times that I have. I'm grateful for

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the times that I have, you know, like experiences, not

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trying to rush through things, giving things time, giving things

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their time, giving things you know, you know, and putting

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an effort and being supportive and small things like farmers'

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markets and things like that that are interesting and fun

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that you can go to that you don't go to

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every day, that you don't experience every day, you know,

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receiving a sweet message from her friend, you know, and

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there's it's interesting. I recently had a birthday and I

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got so many great messages from folks. It was so amazing.

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And I'm still responding. I'm trying to independently respond back

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to every single person, you know, separately, and it's it

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takes a lot of time and effort. I think I

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got to fifty today or sixty. I'm gonna do more

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tomorrow and keep going, and you know, it might be

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toward the end of the month when I finally get

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them all taken care of. But at least I'm going

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to do that. And it's important to mean at first

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you're like, oh my god, there's so much to take

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care of, but it's like, but it's nice, and I'm

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grateful to have the option of doing that, of even

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having to think about, oh my gosh, I have to

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respond back to these people, or I have to do this,

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or I have to do that. But it's like, you know, yeah,

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it's not about have to It's about, Wow, this is

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cool that I have people.

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That care about me, that you know, reach out.

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And I want you to start thinking about the things

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that you can be grateful for and the things that

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you can slow down a little bit and just recognize

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and realize and see it and be in that moment,

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because these are the things that will make life better.

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You know, watching the news twenty four to seven, you know,

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waiting for the latest tweet, you know, it's probably not

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going to make you feel great. Watching everybody on social

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media probably the same thing isn't going to make you

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feel great. Watching TV and watching you know, reality shows

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or watching TV shows probably not going to make you

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feel great because remember, all this stuff is like programming

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it's all programming to make you feel a certain way.

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You know, the news is great for stressing you out

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and creating fear. That's how they make money. That's how

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they they make money. You know, they don't make money

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by sharing with you the things that are actually good

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and the things that are helpful. They make money by

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scaring you, putting you in a fear factor.

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You know.

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Social media it's all about comparison. It's all about comparing

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your lives to other people and seeing what they do

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or not do. You you know, watching TV these shows,

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some of them are uplifting, most of them aren't, you know,

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most of them are very negative in nature, and they're

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not giving you the support you need to grow and

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to thrive in your life. So these are the things

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that I just want you to think about. And I

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know that you know, most of the content that I

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talk about as relationships, and if you are in a

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challenging relationship, this, this particular podcast should be something that

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you kind of hold, you know, sacred, because I want

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you to start thinking about what really is working, because

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just because you have a challenging relationship doesn't mean that

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your whole life is falling apart. It just means that

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your relationship is challenging and we might have to focus

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on some other stuff and I want, you know, to

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be there and to support that with you and support

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you in that movement because it is so important and

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it is so valuable to.

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Be able to see this.

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And if you haven't already, check out my YouTube channel,

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go to YouTube put in Life Coach Ashley Burgess or

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just Ashley Burgess and if you can subscribe, we have

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close to two hundred thousand subscribers.

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We're getting there and we're almost there.

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We're almost crossing that hump of two hundred and could

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really use the support. If there's other content that you

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would like me to address and things that you would

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like me to talk about in this show and in

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this podcast or in videos or other content, please let

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me know. I always like to hear feedback and I

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appreciate you know, thoughts and ideas and opinions, and I'd

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love to hear some of your thoughts, your ideas and

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your opinions, and so check that out. Also, if you're

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on social media, you know I'm on Facebook, you can

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follow me there on Facebook and you know, comment on

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some of this stuff there. I'll definitely follow you back

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on Instagram the same follow me. I'll follow you all

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that is Ashley Burgess. So I hope this show has

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helped you the concept that the small things aren't small,

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and the great things that are that seem to be

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small are actually the biggest things there are in order

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to ground us and help us to see the value

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in our life and have gratitude as well. And share

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if you can with your family and friends this show

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and in the meantime, I'll be back next week with

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a new podcast. And I appreciate you tuning in and

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you've been listening to the Ashley Purchase podcast. I want

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you to have a great day and don't forget to

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live your true life.